Awkward Press

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Archive for ‘Politics’

On Healthcare

June 16, 2009 By: Category: Greatest Hits, Politics

Health insurance is the dumbest system anyone could ever create for dealing with sick people. Insurance in general makes no sense. I can understand paying for things that you are going to use. If I buy a CD (plastic containment system for music, popular circa 1985-2005), then I get to keep that CD and the music that is on it. One does not have a similar thrill of ownership with health insurance. My insurance company won’t even give me a book listing my benefits. I am paying approximately $2400/year for a plastic card. They could at least make the cards out of something slightly more substantial, like pewter.

At its heart, health insurance is a punishment and reward system for bodily functions. According to Wikipedia, the health insurance system as it stands today did not develop until the 1950s. Before that, when you went to the doctor, you paid him for the doctoring he gave you. Now you pay the insurance company in advance for the doctoring you might get in the future, and then you pay the doctor a little bit more when he actually gives you that doctoring. What Wikipedia does not say, and what I have always been curious about: why does health care have anything to do with employment? I can understand that it is in a company’s best interest to make sure their employees are physically well. But there are an awful lot of areas where my employer does not seem to care about my health. Like food. Employers do not buy my groceries. Or sleep. I am required to buy my own mattresses and make sure I get to sleep at a reasonable hour.


What About Iran?

June 15, 2009 By: Category: Politics

Okay, so what’s the story with Iran, anyway? I’ll admit, pretty much everything I know about Iranian history I learned from watching Persepolis. I didn’t even read Persepolis, I watched Persepolis. Which, now that I think about it, Persepolis is subtitled, so it’s probably actually more work to watch Persepolis than it is to read the graphic novel upon which it’s based. That is a first in the history of movies.

But so I get it, Iran was a totally fun, free country before the hardliners came to power in the 80s. And now it’s awful and scary or whatever. But they have elections? And they’re not just a sham? Everyone seems surprised at the possibility that Ahmadinejad could have stolen the election. But like, if Kim Jong Il won the popular vote in North Korea, I don’t think anyone would bat an eyelash. So what is Iran? A democracy, or a dictatorship? Right, okay, the Ayatollah or whoever is really in charge, and the president’s just a figurehead. So then why did we ever give a shit about Ahmadinejad in the first place? I’m so confused!

In other news, here’s a picture of a cat in a taco outfit.



(Via Buzzfeed.)

To Our Friends Across the Pond

June 08, 2009 By: Category: Politics

From an article about beleaguered British PM Gordon Brown:

Only last week, Brown spoke of how his “Presbyterian conscience” had been hurt by the extravagant expense claims made by many of his parliamentary colleagues. And in his awkward press conference on Friday afternoon, he again invoked his father’s teachings.

For the record, Mr. Brown is in no way affiliated with Awkward Press, LLC, or any of our subsidiaries, including Delusional Paranoids & Co., Outrageously Incompetent Trust, or Worse than Thatcher, LTD.