Awkward Press

Independent publishers of imaginative fiction and daily meditations on the ridiculousness of the universe.

Bikes Can Work

January 27, 2010 By: Category: Friends

Matt's bike.

My good friend Matt recently started a blog to discuss practical street biking. I realize this has nothing to do with publishing, but it’s a pretty fascinating topic for those who like the idea of making bikes your primary mode of transportation. I recently picked up a used bike from a friend for $50 and I’ve been trying to use it as much as a I can. It’s kind of scary careening around the streets of Los Angeles on a bike, ’cause suckas sure don’t like sharing the road. I haven’t had any real problems so far, though, and it sure is an easy way to get free exercise.

That is all. Now get back to work on your story, please.

Put On a Red Light

September 10, 2009 By: Category: Uncategorized

From Matt, who is in Amsterdam:

The best part about the red light district is listening in on all the dudes egging each other to go in. One Australian guy was doing everything to get his friend to go in at the same time as him. Lots of back and forth later, the guy goes in alone and the rest of his friends go to a pub to wait. 15 minutes later the guy comes running up to the pub:

Guy: Give me €50.
Friend: Why?
Guy: I’ve done something bad. Give me €50.
Friend: What?
Guy: I’ll tell you later. Give me €50. Give me €50!
Friend: What?
Guy: Give me €50. I’ll pay you right back. I’ll go to the ATM. Just
give me €50. I’m not going back in. Just give me €50.
Friend: What is going on?
Guy: Just… Basically, I need to get my watch back.


August 24, 2009 By: Category: Friends

From Matt:

Just witnessed a broadside hit and run. Dude in a huge pickup blasted through a stop sign and smashed into the driver’s side of a Porsche, then took off screeching down the side street. Dude in the Porsche was fine; wild that the airbag stopped it all.

There were maybe six of us who witnessed it. But the craziest part? The front license plate from the truck fell off on impact so it was right there in the street.