That's why I gave TBL another chance; I hoped it'd Beetlejuice me. But it was still just mediocre.

2) Honestly... if you find The Big Lebowski hilarious, your sense of humor works in a very different way than mine does, so your "this is hilarious" advice goes through a filter that someone who doesn't think "The Big Lebowski is hilarious" isn't subjected to. I doubt I really use that filter to weight their reviews much, but it's more that, when I see something else they think is hilarious and can't see any humor in it or at most a little, I'm not surprised (recent example: being introduced to "Look Around You," which that group likes almost as much as bowling and making The Dude references, and yet I couldn't see anything even vaguely funny about).

It's been driving me crazy, though. There have been so many movies that people have strong reactions about, that I can't understand how someone could have a strong reaction. "Lost in Translation" was a big one on that scale. That was an utterly and completely ok movie. It wasn't great, and it wasn't terrible, and I couldn't see how anyone could put it on either of those extremes... but I'd been told time and again that I'd either love it or hate it. How? And then there's "There Will Be Blood" and "No Country for Old Men," two movies I found utterly unenjoyable which so many people loved. I'm still convinced those got their reputations purely through powerful marketing and I somehow missed that campaign, because I can't see how actually watching them without already having your mind made up that you like them could switch you to that setting.

My feelings on the opinions people have about those three movies are much stronger than my feelings about The Big Lebowski, but it's in the same vein. I just don't get how people can care so much about such a solidly "ok" movie.

To me, it's a pretty important personality test. I prefer to think, "that movie is not for me," than "that movie is not good." I mean, unless it's "Rachel Getting Married," which we can all agree is a terrible movie. I just personally don't have that kind of unwavering confidence in my opinion. And there are a lot of great movies that just haven't hit me the right way on the first or even second viewing - Magnolia, for example. My favorite records are often albums that don't jump out at me at first, but reveal their secrets over time. So I have a hard time ever saying, "Final verdict: bad movie."

There are even movies that I hold out judgment on, imagining I will eventually figure it out. "There Will Be Blood," for example. (What is it with P.T. Anderson?) I didn't like it. I've seen it twice, and I had problems with it each time. But so many people whose opinions I respect like it, that I assume it just hasn't crept under my skin yet the way it should. I like it by proxy.

Maybe that's a wishy-washy way of viewing art. But I think the whole reason I watch movies and listen to music is to have that moment of connection with the other people who are listening to and watching the same things ... even when we disagree, art is the lens through which I can get a greater understanding of how other people see the world. So I can see how it's mildly irritating when I feel one way and my friend feels another, but I think that's a great catalyst for a discussion of how we think the way we do, in the ultimate quest to reach a greater understanding. No question, agreement creates a nice feeling of connection. But reaching understanding in disagreement often feels more rewarding.